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Like, I don't care whose taxes they are, or if the person whose taxes I'm doing are gonna do my taxes afterwards, but sitting down and filing federal taxes for the spring quarter is like, my favorite thing to do for hours and hours. I know you're not supposed to talk about how you 'like' doing taxes, and everyone is like, 'Ew, you actually like doing taxes? I love doing taxes! Have you ever heard anybody say this out loud? But replace doing taxes with giving blow jobs, and it's utterly within the realm of possibility that you've heard a woman say this. Probably in mixed company — or, if she's that far gone, among a group of female friends. Acting like you enjoy copious bone in your mouth is somewhat akin to a humblebrag. The depressing truth is that statements like these are often a gambit for male attention, a way for a woman to prove that she's somehow cooler, less prudish, or more into sex a unicorn than other women regs horses. I know this because I used to be one.

Be expressive. Tell her how amazing her skin, her lips, and her dialect feel against your cock. Then acquaint with her how hot she looks. Accolade her eyes, her tits, her ass—anything that turns you on. Let her do her thing.

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